Chicks are fluffy?
by Evil Hamster God
Summary: Hetalia, DMC, randomness. One-shot. That's all. XD


Dante was laying on his couch, sucking a lollipop. He stuck the whole thing in his mouth and choked when he heard someone open the door.

-Who the hell...-he was interrupted by something yellow and fluffy that jumped in his mouth.

-MPH?!

-HELLO, WEAKLING!-a blond man with red eyes and blue clothes came in.-Do you want to have some fun with Ore-sama?~

-WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?!-Dante spit the thing he realised was a chicken out.

-Wha...? You don't know me. FOOLISH MORTAL! - the other man kicked him in the stomach and pushed the door closed. - Well it's okay, you'll remember my name soon enough...You'll be YELLING it for the next 2 hours. HAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Dante tried to get up but an army of chicks jumped on him and refused to let him do so.

-My name is Gilbert Weillschmidt. I am more known as the IMMORTAL and DEFINATELY STILL EXISTENT NATION OF PRUSSIA!!! - he put a CD in Dante's player and a strange song started to play. - I hope you don't mind, my voice makes me horny...

-WHAT THE F*CK ARE YOU DOING HERE?

-Fullfilling every fangirl's dream, of course. - Gilbert bent down and licked Dante's ear.

One of the chick bit Dante's pants' zip and unzipped it. The other chickens gathered and started biting his boxers.

-WHAT'S GOING ON!...OH, DON'T BITE ME THERE!

-PIYO PIYOI, PIPIYO PIYO YO! - translated as "IF I WAS FEMALE YOU WOULD'VE LIKED IT, WOULDN'T YOU! BITCH!"

-Now, now, Sunshine, don't be mad. - Prussia licked Dante's faced and then got up. - Hey, Dante?

-WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME, YOUR FREAKING PSYCHOPATH!

-Why, I want your virginity.

-I'M NOT A VIRGIN!

-Ohohoho, your SECOND virginity. You know, everyone has 2 virginities. One's physical, other's psychic. You still have your second one, I FEEL IT.

-GET AWAY FROM ME!-Dante tried to grab his pistols.

-Now, now, don't try that. - Gilbert took out one of his own and shot.

-YOU SON OF A %* %$^&$%*& *%^$ ^&# IN A $%&#%, YOU SHOT MY HAND.

-I did? Well you should be honoured. Ivan would shoot you somewhere else. Now let's get over with this, take over your pants.

-I...NO!

-YOU DARE ARGUE WITH ME?

-YES, I DO! YOU'RE A FREAK WITH RED EYES WHICH THINKS HE'S A FREAKIN COUNTRY THAT I'VE NEVER HEARD OF AND YOU CARRY LIKE, 30 CHICKS AROUND WITH YOU AND YOU MAKE THEM BITE OTHER PEOPLE'S...

-THAT'S IT! - Gilbo got mad and kicked the demon so he would turn around.

-STOP KICKING ME YOU SON OF A TAIWANESE PROSTITUTE!

-YOU STOP COMPLAINING, YOU SLUTTY LIECHTENSTEIN WHORE!

-WHAT DOES LIECHTENSTEIN HAVE TO DO WITH ALL THIS?

-The first modern prostitutes came from Liechtenstein?

-Oh, they did?

-Yeah, I read it on Wiki. They were a super organisation. With lotsa money.

-Wow...You can learn lotsa stuff from these fanfics, it seems.

-Especially from Hammy's.

* * *

Author: HAMMY'S ALWAYS WATCHING YOU and will continue providing First Class comedy written arts. Stand by for more!

* * *

-...Pyo?

-What was that?

-What was what?

-Just now. Some girl appeared and...HEY, ARE YOU HERE? HELP ME, THIS GUY'S HERE CRAZY, HELP! HELP! GIIRL!

-I have no idea what you're talking about.

-But...WAIT, WHY AM I BLONDEFOLDED? AND WHY IS IT FLUFFY?!

-Piyo!

-This is a blindfold made especially from Ore-sama for Ore-sama from the feathers of my AWESOME chicks' behinds.

-I HAVE CHICKEN ASS FUR ON MY FACE?!

-Basically, yes.

-PLEASE, GOD, LET ME WAKE UP!

-Now, now, I took care of God.

* * *

-in Heaven-

A seemingly old man with long tied blondhair was leaned on a door.

-FREDERIC! OPEN THE DOOR!

-Sorry, Mr. Sponge Bob, can't do so. My dear sweet Gilbert asked me to not let you out 'till 4 pm.

-BUT...BUT ROME'S HERE...HE'S GOT A WHIP! PLEASE! !%, WINNIE THE POOH'S ALSO HERE! YOU KNOW WHAT HE DID TO ME LAST TIME WITH THAT BLOODY STICKY HONEY! HE'S HOLDING SOMETHING STRANGE! FREDERIC, LET ME OUT!

-Oh nononono, Frederich, don't let him out ok?~-Gramps Rome's voice was heard.

-Worry do not, I won't.-the first man said, smiling. He took out an mp3 player and put the earphones on.

-FREDERIC...FREDERIC, DO YOU HEAR ME?!

-BITTE BITTE, GIB MIR GIFT!

-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

-Thank Sponge Bob for Rammstein!- Rome said happily.

-RAWR! GRRRRRRRRR-agreed Pooh.

-II I I LOVE LITTLE SPOOONGE~-Pedobear popped out of the wardrobe.

-FREDERIC!

-DAS ALLES IST DEUTSCHLAND~

-NOOOOOOOOO

* * *

-SUCK HARDER! MEIN GOTT, NORWAY'S BETTER THAN YOU!

-MPH %^#...

-Wooooooooooooow.-Vergil said, eating popcorn. -Wun' some Francis?

-Oh my, thank you. - France smiled and joined him.

* * *

**All trolling will be appreciated. BITCH. ^^**

**For Krissy~ Dun murder me while I sleep/While I'm awake D: Please?**


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